Like a Thread from a Pink Spider Web

君は嘘の糸はり巡らし
小さな世界全てだと思ってた
近づくものは何でも傷つけて、
君は空が四角いと思っていた

「これがすべて…どうせこんなもんだろう?」

君は言った… それも嘘さ…
ケバケバしい君の模様が寂しそうで
極楽鳥が珍しく話しかけた

「蝶の羽いただいてこっち来いよ。
向こうでは思い通りさ。」

ピンクスパイダー 「行きたいなあ」
ピンクスパイダー 「翼が欲しい」

捕らえた蝶の命乞い聞かず
君は空を睨む

「傷つけたのは憎いからじゃない、
僕には羽が無く、あの空が高すぎたから」

「私の翼を使うがいいわ、スパイダー。
飛び続ける辛さを知らないあなたも、いつか気がつくことでしょう。
自分が誰かの手の中でしか飛んでいなかった事に。
そして、それを自由なんて呼んでいたことにも。」

借り物の翼ではうまく飛べず、
まっさかさま墜落してゆく

ピンクスパイダー 「もうだめだあ」
ピンクスパイダー 「空は見えるのに…」
ピンクスパイダー 「失敗だあ」
ピンクスパイダー 「翼が欲しい…」

わずかに見えたあの空のむこう、
鳥たちは南へ

「もう一度飛ぼう、この糸切り裂き 自らのジェットで
あの雲が通り過ぎたら…」

ピンクスパイダー 空は呼んでいる 
ピンクスパイダー ピンクスパイダー

桃色のくもが空を流れる

Sugizo – Tree of Life

SuGiZo – Tree of Life

I bought it on a day when the moon was FULL….
and this was one of the few things that worked out great today…
a lot of stuff did NOT go my way..
so this will be about my life and my day, my tree of life and not much about Sugizo LOL

Then again when I got home, around midnight, I summed it all up …

…and you know it’s really funky how we tend to emotionally really can mess up our
experiences, whether it be over a day, a week or a life time…
I was upset because for a ton of silly mishaps and ‘emergencies’.
I ended up being so delayed that I (and well Phoe-Lo too) had to skip a LIVE tonight

The other ‘bad’ thing that happened was that I bought a Japanese iTunes card and my American account still blocks it out.
So these two things made me think gaaah what a day…
but then when I looked at the whole picture….I saw something different, or maybe
I saw it differently
……
a hide-miracle happened, and I got a last minute appointment for doing the
tattoo
that I felt was so important to me already before leaving for Japan,
and was one of the must do things here in Japan!
I was just sitting at dinner time and talking with Phoe-Lo and I said to her:
“Well the tattoo I guess just wasn’t meant to happen, because the only time I have now
would be Thursday after 6 pm, and the only place I know about said they didn’t have any
times until next week….”
…..
Why does hide always have to do miracles in very the last minute ?? ha ha ha
After midnight I got an email in my inbox… one of the tattoo guys said he could
come in on Thursday and do it for me.. would 7PM/19:00 o’clock be a good time…
WOW… Yes yes yes!
by the way this is the text that will be embodied …or embedded or.. inked…
or ha ha ha ha  it will be tattooed…

ピンクスパイダー 空は呼んでいる

the very same words I heard at Miura Reien in May…when I decided that YES I should
jump, leap, fly… and catch a pink cloud …and be in Japan….for a reason that wasn’t
totally clear to me.….

Also I was upset at Tower Records in Ikebukuro for not having the Ra:IN album I wanted
to buy…but I should choose to be happy that they could put one on hold in the
Shibuya store for it…
See there is always a choice on how to react.…but we all tend forget that..

Same when the Izakaya here downstairs had no table … first I was upset..
or well not toooo bad, but I was a little annoyed, but then, because of it, we
decided to go to the little Spanish place across the street.. and
WOW I got a glass of the best Rioja Crianza wine with just the perfect temperature…
so what am I really whining about and WHY?

To relearn takes time because we need to unlearn old ways of thinking first,
old ways of reacting to our reality….

The best thing today though, was also the reason that I was delayed
( and still I felt negatively about it… weird),
was that I printed out the art work I have been working on.
It came out way better than I could possibly have hoped for, so once again I had proved
to myself that rethinking and abolishing evaluation, as well as not dividing life in terms of
good and bad is the WAY TO GO!!

I am sad, yes I am sad, to leave Japan, but on the other hand I am also
sooooo happy to be able to see some of my beloved people in the US.
Friends that I miss and love..
and now tonight, when I sat online I received a few messages that means the world to me… and I felt how my inner core started to fire up and sparkle by the thought alone
of seeing this friend again!
oh you LIFE … I OWE you MY everything…
oh yes, my life has a life of its own and it is quite
fascinating to UNFOLD it….

oh and regarding my tattoo, I got it at Tokyo Hardcore Tattoo
Highly recommend them!
https://www.facebook.com/TOKYO-HARD-CORE-TATTOO-188100754537592/

 

 

 

 

 

Love & Tokyo

This is about LOVE….. and about  東京 TOKYO

私は東京を大好きです …….

and I’m starting to feel that this for me means an attachment

The moment you start loving you take a risk  of also feeling
low and sad
when the love no longer is reciprocated … or like in my case:
leaving this city even for a month or two….
because of the attachment…

and yes, yes, I know what you will tell me….
I can still love Tokyo, which is great and I’m sure of it,
but due to this attachment I will definitely feel a separation and
it will hurt….

Second thought coming up, is that I have been traveling all my life,
lived here and there across the globe,  but never felt this way to a
place before…. only to people!
WHY do I feel such a strong bond with Japan,
and especially to Tokyo
…???

When I wrote Tokyo above I really meant my emotional area of Tokyo,
which is way bigger than Tokyo proper.

Now I will repeat the Miura Reien story in the next blog or so,
because it probably has some valid insights and clues…
My reason for breaking up from everything, and doing
the Pink Spider jump out to the unknown….
the flying with the clouds and letting go…..
I’m not dead yet…. I’m still here…
but the story and the path taken during 2011 might explain
why I’m suddenly able to feel LOVE again…
LOVE, also for people…. really scary business!

 

 

 

The Miura Shore

Miura Kaigan….the Miura Shore

 

 

I know that it is different to actually be in a place compared to
looking at a photo.
You cannot hear the seagulls, the land birds chirping,
the waves hitting the shore, the wind..
You cannot smell the ocean; the salt, the roots hanging to dry,
the fishing nets, the hemp ropes…
but maybe the photos can convey that everything around this
bus stop (Miura reien) looks the same, or appears to look the same,
not including the changes of seasons.
Everything here breathes and tells you that:
everything here remains the same
Miura Kaigan is always Miura Kaigan

hide will always be a little over 33 years old.
his brother hiroshi has aged,
DIE, Pata, INA, Toshi, Chirolyn… they all have …even Heath,
even though it is harder to detect ha ha,
and yes so has Yoshiki….
we who go on…. we age….
hide doesn’t!
His playful recordings up on that roof top with Jennifer Finch,
will always be our hide.

The ocean remains the same….
yet at the same time…
The waves are proof that the ocean is also always active,
and ever-changing,

for us who go on aging… the ocean remains the same….
for us still here amongst the living, hide IS the same..
the same inspiration
the same voice
the same songs
the same call for love and Stay Free My MISERY

He is still with us, every day
like the ocean….

 

 

 

 

hide’s aura

hide  birthday at Miura Reien 2011

now after a night being all happy and wired at Narciss December 12th,
Keep in mind the reason Vagu*Project captured my heart:
The reason was at that the first time I saw Vagu*Project live I felt
hide’s presence…. we ALL felt it!!
My heart almost stopped that evening, and when we left that that night,
I remember asking my friends…
did you feel that? Sense that? See that? hmmm that….
that … … …?

… and the reply came fast… yeah, you mean hide?!

The Vagu guitarist Shinya who just has ”IT”
there is Something about him….the way he moves, acts, moves his eyes.
and YuI who radiates the mentally.. emotions… like wordlessly exhales
hide’s spirit.
NO, Shinya, the guitarist , does not look like hide.
He doesn’t even have crazy Visual Kei make up like the other two,
nor is he sporting some kind of hide wannabe   outfit…
YET he has something like an hide manners and body language,
and
YuI, the vocalist has the hide aura

He too doesn’t look like hide physically…
it is impossible to explain in any other way.
Shinya somehow behaves like hide. the way he treats his pick,
the way he looks at the others while playing,
YuI feels like he has an aura around him which is hide’s.
Shinya also plays in a band called
中国釣具店 (Chinese Fishing Tackle Store)
http://www.chu-tsuri.com
Update:
Shinya no longer does. He is now regular member in Vagu*Project

Anyway the transition is there
HIDE is the transition…
My physical transition from Vagu*Projects live to the cemetery was
however rapid, brutal and unkind ha ha ha
(and later that got some undesired consequences).
I got back home in decent time from Urawa (it’s quite a distance up in
Saitama prefecture, Northern metropolitan area of Tokyo.. suburbs)
but then I just had to rip the Vagu*Projects CDs,  and listen and
enjoy it all over again and share it here on te blog, and with my
beloved friend and all kinds of energizing activities instead of going
to rest and sleep.
Plus I had to research train schedules and maps for a bit of complicated
travel on December 13th
Having no internet on the phone is beyond frustrating ..
OK so bottom line… I got in bed a tad late for getting up at 9-ish..
needed to catch a train from here at 9.50 am
I did get up but not at 9 , but it was at 9-ish at least.

Getting down to Miura Reien was the easy part!
Done this before now.. felt like a pro.. ha ha

Departed around 10.10 am I think..
I don’t recall now if I left at 10 or 10.10 and that really doesn’t matter,
because going down there is no match.
Even the trick that JR has played on me before at Shinjuku Station
didn’t throw me off this time! ha ha ha
I take Odakyu line from home to Shinjuku then there one needs to catch
for example Shonan Shinjuku line to go to Yokohama.

Train leaves at JR Shinjuku Station Track number 1 BUT….
now this is the trick..
nowhere does it say in English that it is run via Tokaido line!!
So you just have to know the characters for Yokohama 横浜
and generally know what you are doing ha ha and look at the time,
and the schedule and the signs for the correct departure.

Yes I have never really told you much, or whined about, the fact
that life in Japan can be rather challenging at times.
This particular day had its fair share of mishaps because of it!
Anyway from home to Shinjuku, Shinjuku to Yokohama,
in Yokohama onto Keio line to go down to Miura Kaigan

NB: I used another way when I explained how to get down there
in the BLOG from this spring way back on this Blog now…
THAT other way is essential if you travel on a JR pass and want to
use it as much as u can, because
the JR Pass is not valid on the Keio line!!

Then the BUS from Miura Kaigan to Miura Reien, which I really
don’t even know the number of anymore…  I just steer to the right when
exiting the station and the bus stop (nr 2 I think it says on the Bus stop ha
but check with this blog on earlier posts before you jump on any bus by chance.
You can use search features for tags here on the PSW blog).

Then the beautiful shore I always have to stop a moment, or a
few minutes before leaving the ocean behind. Even this day even though
the crowd today lines up like a hide and X-inspired snake up the path.
I don’t think I was mentally prepared for that fact either!
The “so-many-people-there-today” deal.
Of course I realized this before leaving for Miura on his birthday,
but didn’t quite get it until I was there.
Personally as much as it is cool and fun to go up there with a friend,
I must recommend going there alone.
To stand looking out at that ocean and listening to hide’s voice
just grabs my heart every time! The boats up on the shoreline.
The fishing nets….